maties, you idolize us

 

you love 'em

Adults and children adore us, aaarh, that's right, and what's there not to adore. We're strong go getters. We're tough, and we're in control. We don't follow the rules, we make them, and if we don't like someone...well, we make them walk the plank, or swab the decks, whatevers appropriate, I guess.. but they never go unpunished. I hate to be repetitive, but isn't it obvious, your leaders are the captains and first mates leading the big pirate ship of America. By mimicking us, you're going back to your own idealogical roots...the rawest, most honest form of capitalist competition, where the stakes are high, the balance is your life, and if you succeed, you get more bootie than you could ever imagine.